If your parent tells you that they’re happy with how you turned out, they’re lying, just like when they say they don’t have a favorite kid. In all honestly, they wanted you to turn out like one of the people we’ll be profiling in our new series ‘You Oughta Know’ … like Gary Vaynerchuk.
Who is Gary Vaynerchuk?
If Macho Man Randy Savage and Bill Gates had a baby, it would be Gary Vaynerchuk (or Gary Vee if you’re in the know). Luckily for us, Gary is a little easier on the eyes than this mutant Slim Jim loving ninja of commerce. According to his Wikipedia page he is “American serial entrepreneur, four-time New York Times bestselling author, speaker and internationally recognized internet personality.” This might make him sound like an international man of mystery or Bond villain but to the legions of followers who subscribe to the Gospel According to Gary, he’s a fucking hustler.
What’s in it for me?
Are you a lazy, self-loathing, waste of your parent’s basement space who “thought of Uber before Uber?” Then Gary is just the kick in the scrotum you need. Short of verbally water-boarding you, Mr. Vaynerchuk is going to scare you straight … but not in the Sally Jesse Raphael kids-gone-wild-that-are-being-whipped-into-shape-by-a-Major-Payne-lookalike way. In the step-up or shut-up kinda way.
Why is he better than every other YouTubevangelist on the internet?
Well for one, he’s a lot less intimidating than Tony Robbins. And he …
- Is more energetic than a 13-year-old who just discovered internet porn
- Practices what he preaches – he is better at social media than a 25-year-old aspiring Instagram model who works in PR
- Doesn’t try to sell you a 5-week program to grow your penis 4 inches
- Oh, and did I mention he curses like a sailor?
What are his credentials?
Well for one, he’s got a boatload more money than you will ever have. So that’s something. In addition to being an online motivational personality, which your fast-talking neighbor with a cheap webcam has been doing since the advent of public access TV, he owns a multi-million dollar social media/ad agency called Vayner Media. Before that he built a family wine business from a $3 million dollar mom and pop shop to a fucking $60 million dollar empire of fermented grapes. And did I mention he overcame being born in the Soviet Union? You know, that place that didn’t like capitalism all that much?
But first, a Zack Morris timeout.
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Why shouldn’t you listen to him?
Welp, he tells the truth and he will probably hurt your feelings more than once. He’ll pull some obscure example out of his ass that you’ll eerily relate to, like“if you stopped playing Madden for 4 hours after work, maybe that candy corn flavored dental dam business would take off.” SHOTS FIRED. He also humblebrags ALOT. And maybe the hipster beanies.
What content should I be consuming?
His YouTube channel is the best place to start …
And his podcasts, website, daily newsletter, Snapchat, Twitter, Instagram and probably a bunch of other social sites that you never knew existed … or of course his best-selling books. THIS. DUDE. IS. EVERYWHERE.
Gary Vee isn’t a genius, he’s not some savior who is going to change your life if you read one of his books (well, actually he might) and he isn’t going to tell you “it’s alright” and give you a shoulder to cry on. He is a fucking business man in every sense of the word. He sells and makes money. He’s that kid you knew growing up who burned Eminem songs from Napster onto CD-R’s on his family computer and sold them out of his locker … that guy who convinced you to trade him a Charizard for a Pikachu at the height of the Pokemon craze … and, true story, he’s the kid who was franchising lemonade stands in his neighborhood when you were still wetting the bed.
So be prepared for a whole lot of common sense, brace yourself for the truth, but most importantly be prepared to realize how much harder you can be working in EVERY aspect of life.
Check this dude out. NOW.