coffee runs

Ask a BO$$ – My Boss Says Thank You Too Much

My new boss sends me emails that just say “thank you!” Or “thank you so much!” as replies to almost every email I send to her or that she is copied on from me. I try to appreciate the gratitude, but we are crazy busy and they just feel like a waste of time for her and for me. I often receive them late at night, and while I myself often work at night or on weekends and don’t mind receiving requests in off hours, it feels like an unnecessary interruption to my downtime to send an email with essentially no content. My uncharitable instincts tell me an email that just says “thank you!” sent at 10 p.m. is just to let me know she’s working so late, but I don’t actually think that’s the case.

My passive aggressive instinct is to send her a reply that just says “You’re so welcome!” every time but that doesn’t solve anything. I’m usually all in favor of direct communication but I’m really afraid of coming across as super whiny for complaining about something so small. We are new to working together, and I would like to put my best foot forward. Also, does she think I’m ungrateful for all of her work because I don’t acknowledge every communication with a two-word email?

Oh my god! Stop your whining. You should be pleased that your boss even takes the time to acknowledge your existence given what a pleasure you must be to work with given this terrible question. I have coworkers that CC everyone to say thank you for replying to every single email, and it’s nice to get a little something for the effort.

The downtime issue sounds like a you problem. If you’re already checking your email, it’s not downtime, it’s working. If that’s the case, just delete that shit and move on, you wrote a 200-word submission to a self-help blog when a simple click of the delete button would have done. On the other hand, if you have notifications on for email on your phone, then this is entirely your fault. Turn them off. Don’t answer your boss’ emails until the next morning. It’s not rocket science.

Your boss doesn’t care that you’re not replying back to her emails. She is simply going about her business being your boss. I suggest saying nothing like this to her or you will soon be out looking for a job. Can you imagine if an intern came to you and asked you to stop saying thank you to them? Read your own question back to yourself out loud in the mirror and just listen to how stupid you sound.

As a side note, your boss 100% is sending late thank you emails proving that she’s working late. It’s the oldest trick in the book. Chances are she’s not even online, but just has her emails scheduled to send after work hours. Either that or she works very hard and resents you for your lack of gratitude.

You will come across as whiny for asking your boss to stop. You can go ahead and bring this up to her, thereby ruining your relationship and any hope for advancement in the company. Suck it up and move on you big baby.

Thanks for reading!